How To Fall In Love With Your Best Friend
by SeasoningS
Summary: Hermione loves Ron, but with him always asking her for love advice, will she sit around and wait for him?
1. Default Chapter

A/N: Hello. I've had an idea for this story now for awhile, so I've finally decided to write it. It'd kinda based on real life, so it should come fairly easily to me. Please read and review! I'd greatly appreciate knowing if I should continue/constructive criticism. And for anyone who's reading Escape, I haven't abandoned it, I'm just trying to think of how to continue.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Oprah

…..

**Prologue: Musings of a 17 Year-Old Witch**

I guess I'm not what you'd call an ordinary girl. The whole being-a-witch thing put a damper on normal. And memorizing books doesn't help either. And there is that whole best-friends-with-The-Boy-Who-Lived thing. Oh, and going to a ball with a famous quidditch star, who happened to be in the Triwizard Tournament. Yeah…I guess I'm not that normal. Though parts are too normal for my liking.

Enter Ron Weasley right about now. My other best friend/partner in crime, he's 6 feet, with bright red hair and bright blue eyes as well as freckles all over his pale cheeks. I've known him sense I was eleven, almost twelve, and all I can say is that we've gone through a lot together in that 5 years. Mainly, You-Kn…Voldemort. But let's not get into that now, seeing as I believe I was going to tell you why knowing Ron was too normal for my liking. You see, in that 5 years, I've developed a slight…okay huge…crush on Ron. And, seeing as he's my best friend, I can't tell him.

Oh, and then there's that other part. You know, the part where he keeps asking my advice on girls. Yep, Ron goes to me, the supreme advice-giver. His "Oprah," as he calls it, (I told him about talk shows). So now, after he went out with Lavendar, Padma, and likes Hannah Abbot, what am I supposed to do? Oh yeah, what I've always done…wait.

Aren't the teen years great?

…..

There it is! The prologue! I'm currently on to Chapter 1, so please review and I'll get it to you quicker! Reviews are my caffeine.


	2. Chapter 1: The Art of Mentally Slapping ...

Disclaimer: I still don't own Harry Potter

A/N: When the— sign is there, it's still Hermione speaking. Just for the record.

**Chapter 1: The Art of Mentally Slapping Yourself**

**…**

Let me just get this straight: I am not a morning person. Ask anybody. They can testify to my puffy eyes, tangled hair, and vague expression. And no, I don't take drugs. That said, Wednesday morning began the same as any other summer morning. You know the routine, getting up, throwing on my oversized "London" sweatshirt, and stumbling down the stairs. However, that morning, instead of being greeted by a hungry Crooshanks, I was greeted by a hungry Crooshanks and two parents that should have been at work two hours ago. I went through the things that could possibly keep them home from their precious work… I didn't sneak out, I didn't stay up late, my room already was clean…It left me no other option.

"Why…you…here?" I managed to croak.

My parents glanced at each other in that infuriating way, as if to say, "They're making us work with THIS?"

Whatever was on their minds, however, the politely replied…well sort of politely, I had asked an apparently stupid question after all… "School? You leave today?"

"Haha…Oops!" I laughed…Yup, it's all up here. I went to get my pre-packed trunk. Yeah, last night I remembered I had school today. Of course last night I could think. ANYWAYS… moving right along…

One hour later, after I had fully finished my morning ritual, my scrubbed- moisturized- conditioned- make-upped- self was in the car, ready to drive to the train station and begin my 6th year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Wow, that sounds official.

Two hours after we had left, we arrived. Running so as not to miss the train, which could be disastrous, I finally arrived at platforms 9 and 10. Hugging and kissing my parents good-bye, and 10 promises to write, 13 to stay out of trouble, 8 to have fun, and 22 to practice good oral hygiene-well, they are dentists- I rushed through the barrier to Platform 9 ¾. Still running, I boarded the train with 3 minutes and 23 seconds to spare. Pausing to breathe, I started walking, trying to find my friends on the massive train. Several wrong turns later, I found Harry and Ron along with Ginny, Luna, and Neville. Pausing again to regain my composure, (it didn't work), I finally grabbed the handle and walked into the compartment.

5 pairs of eyes turned to me as I walked in. Talk about awkward.

"HERMIONE!" I had a sudden vision that I was being run over by a stampede of angry gazelles—wait, no, it was Ginny hugging me. After Ginny relinquished her grip a little, I managed a quick hug to Harry and Ron, sliding into the only available seat. Now your probably asking yourself, "Where was this seat? Why is she leaving us in this tortured suspense? This is killing me!"… actually you're probably asking yourself, "Will she get ON with it already?" in which case I will. ANYWAYS, I slid next to Ron, while trying to breathe, not turn red, and look sexy…or at least presentable… all at once. Let me tell you, this is no easy task. I ended up kind of slouching down. Fortunately, I had a memory of my mother reprimanding—isn't that such a cool word? Reprimanding? Hehe—me. So I sat up straight and blushed. It was a nice compromise, or so I thought.

Ron leaned over towards me and grinned, "I missed you. Harry doesn't give very good love advice."

A perfectly innocent comment, no? BUT, his straight white teeth were showing against his luscious red lips and I wanted to… dammit shut up brain!

"I missed you too, no one to use my infinite knowledge on," I said grinning mischievously, though inside my heart ached…. Okay, okay, I'll shut up! We chatted for a little while, though my witty comments began to wan, and we slipped into a peaceful silence.

We passed the remaining time as we always did: Exploding Snap, sharing stories, the boys eating, Ginny, Luna—kind of— and I gossiping, the works. I even refrained from quoting my all-time favorite book, Hogwarts, a History. There's so many facts in it! I find something new in it every time. Thought that might be because it's magical…ANYWAYS, I even refrained from mentioning SPEW. Yes, I still do SPEW in my spare time. Of course the reason I didn't mention it might be because that when I mentioned "house-elf," I saw five…well, four, Luna didn't know about SPEW, glaring at me and threatening bodily harm. Needless to say, I shut up.

Before we knew it, the castle we called home…well except for Harry, in which case calling it home would be lethal (he explained the prophecy to us before we left over the summer), and the Weasleys, who actually saw their parents…okay maybe I'm the only one who calls it home… ANYWAYS, we boarded the thestral, (man those things are creepy)- pulled carriages, heading up to the great feast that awaited us.

**…**

We walked into the Great Hall, taking in where we spent a good deal of our waking lives at Hogwarts. The enchanted ceiling showed dark clouds, with scattered stars in between, and a crescent moon peering through. The five of us, (Luna went to the Ravenclaw table), found a seat and slid into it, giggling about the sorting, and reminiscing about ours.

The Sorting happened, we clapped for the Gryffindors, and tried not to boo the new Slytherins. We reminisced and gasped, trying to remember being that small. (Ron kindly pointed out I still was). It was soon over, and none too soon. I was starved. And judging by the restless glances and fidgeting of the rest of the students, I was not alone.

As if by reading my mind—whoa, what if he was?— Dumbledore stepped out. The entire hall fell silent, and that is no easy task. If there is any reason Dumbledore deserves respect, it's for silencing roughly 1,000 students.

"Students of Hogwarts. I know this is a tough time for you. However, you are probably too hungry to think about that, so for now I will say: Enjoy," and, grinning, Dumbledore sat down, food appearing before us.

…I…AM…AGAINST…HOUSE-ELF…LABOR…Oh screw it the food looks good! Ahh! Yes! Steak! Mmm…Oh yay now Ron's looking at me strangely.

"What?" I asked him.

"Nothing…I've just never seen a girl eat that much…" He said, with a look on his face that was sort of a mixture of respect, confusedness—is that a word? Confusion maybe?—

and surprise.

"I'm hungry!" I retorted, but it was to know avail.

"Uh huh. You probably just consumed, like, five cows," he said grinning in that adorable way.

"Hey!" Yup, I use great retorts, huh?

"Poor Bessie. May she rest in peace." He said looking solemn.

I swatted him. "Bessie?"

"My aunt read me a book about a cow named Bessie," he explained look rather embarrassed, and his chiseled cheeks turned a cute pink color…

"Aww! That's so cute!"

"Shut up! Cow Killer!" he replied, sticking his tongue out at me.

I swatted him again. "The cow was already dead, someone else ate the rest."

"You mean the morsel that was left," he replied, cocking his eyebrow in that infuriating yet wonderful way…

"Hey! It's no more than I've seen you eat!"

"Yeah, but I'm growing. I've seen you've stopped."

"Alright that's it!" I said as I did the inevitable: I pinched him. And no weak pinch either. I did with my nice long nails, right in the upper skin of his arm until…

"ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT! I GIVE UP! YOU DON'T EAT THAT MUCH!"

I let go. "Thank you. That was all I wanted. I said grinning, turning back to Dumbledore, who had stood up, as all our food was eaten/disappeared now. I had won, and he knew it.

Dumbledore gave a wonderful speech. He told us to bond together in our time of need. He told us that it was dangerous times, and to obey the rules and respect the staff that was here to protect us. He warned us how dangerous Voldemort was, and most of all, he told us to unite for the common cause of good.

People were surprisingly quiet after leaving the Great Hall. It took awhile for the message to sink in. There was only a gentle murmuring as we made our way to the dormitories. I barely remember walking, but suddenly I was saying the password and climbing into the Gryffindor Common Room. I went towards the dormitory, but before I could climb the stairs and fall into a deep sleep, I heard a whisper next to my ear, and looking over, I saw Ron, all muscled and hot 6'2" of him, standing there, and I heard him say, "This isn't over," then race up the stairs.

I suppressed a grin as I walked quietly into my room. Before I fell asleep, my last thought was, "Wow, he smells good."

A/N: There it is, Chapter 1. I don't really like the first part, if anybody has any suggestions that would be much appreciated.

Thank you to all my reviewers! You guys are the best!

Lost.Somewhere.Out.There: Yes, caffeine is very good! Lol.

And everyone else who reviewed, thank you very much, I hope you liked this chapter!

I have vacation starting tomorrow, so more chapters to come! Remember, the more you review, the more I write.


	3. Chapter 2: The Art of Bickering

Thanks to all my reviewers! You guys are the best! (These aren't in any particular order by the way)

**_legolascrazy17_**: Thanks! I agree, they have to get together very soon or I'll go insane!

**_r h 4 ever_**: Thank you! I probably messed up the numbers of eyes, Sorry! The people on the train were: Harry, Ron, Ginny, Neville, Luna, and, of course, Hermione.

**_Paulalou:_**Thank you! I'm trying to make the characters as close to the book as I can, but still use my sense of humor. I'll try harder to keep it more in character!

_**convicted-murderer:**_ Thanks! I'll update as soon as often as I can!

**_annaonstage524_**: Thank you!

**_LegendaryRoxtar_**: Thanks! I'll trying to update once every two or three days.

**_i-luv-fanfictions_**: Thank you!

**_Roncrazychic_**: Thank you!

violin girl: Thanks! I probably shouldn't have mentioned the thestrals. I wasn't sure if Hermione saw anyone die in the ministry, so I tried to keep it neutral, just saying that they were thestral-pulled, not that she actually saw the thestrals. Sorry!

**_Cloudyday_**: Thanks! I'm trying to keep Hermione in character while still using my slightly…odd…sense of humor, but I promise to try to make her more bookwormish!

**_Steph: _**Thanks!

**_Doggies45:_** Thank you! I will definitely keep with this story, don't worry. insert smiley face here (my computer won't let me do them)

**_Vellagirl:_** Thanks!

**_BoX-GhOsT89:_** Thank you!

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, Campbell's, or Cheerios. sigh

**A/N: **Sorry you guys! I promised a quick update, but it took longer than I thought. I got stuck at one place…don't you hate when that happens? Anyways, I'm going back to school tomorrow tear, and it's tech week for the play, but I'll try to update as much as I can! It may not be as long though.

**Chapter 2: The Art of Bickering**

I think we all know I'm a bookworm. There's no denying it. However, morning is morning, no exceptions. So, Thursday morning was not welcome, even if it was the first day of school that I had been looking forward to since…well, June. I went through the early morning routine, then clambered down to the Great Hall for breakfast.

I plopped down next to Ginny and poured myself some orange juice. That woke me up some, but to ensure consciousness through the day, I poured myself a huge bowl of Cheerios. Mm, mm, good. Oh wait, that's Campbells…

"Morning, Hermione," Ginny greeted me, with slightly amused expression as I gradually perked up with the juice.

"Morning Ginny," I grinned.

"Why are you so chipper this morning," she said, looking bemused at the grin plastered across my face.

Of course, I could not tell her the first half reason, which is that a certain red headed Weasley by the name of Ron had just sat across from me. So I told her the other reason.

"It's the first day of NEWT level classes!" I said gleefully.

Ron groaned. "Hermione! How can you be excited about classes! It's school!" he said, chowing down on bacon and sausage, (and he teases me about eating steak! Humph…)

"Ron, It's out sixth year, aren't you the least bit excited? Especially with all the safety protocols, we're bound to learn loads more things than we did last year."

"Excited that it's sixth year? Yes. Excited about hanging out with you guys? Yes. Excited about more time with Snape? No."

He was excited about spending time with me! Well, us, but still! Okay, breathe, Hermione! "I give up!" I sighed exasperatedly.

Ron rolled his eyes and muttered something that sounded strangely like, "Psycho." Pssht, just because he doesn't enjoy learning about all the things that are necessary for life in the wizarding world, doesn't mean he has to take it out on the rest of us.

Oh what am I saying? I hate it when we bicker! It drives me absolutely insane! But, if I stop, what if he thinks something is going on? Like…the fact that I LIKE him. But, if I keep going, he'll think that I DON'T like him. Dammit this sucks. Therefore, I shall do what I have vowed to do many times before: GRADUALLY stop fighting with him until we've stopped. Great plan, huh? Now- memo to brain: stop fighting with Ron.

"Hey, Hermione?"

I glanced up out of my breakfast to see a rather scared-looking Ron looking hopefully at me. Wait— Ron? Scared? Hopeful? Something's wrong here.

Maybe…maybe…maybe… No. I won't even let myself think that. Because I know it won't be what I want it to be.

_** Oh, I hope it is.**_

_ No, it won't be. I need to forget it._

_** It might be.**_

_ That's what I said the last twenty times._

**_ Yes, but maybe this time…_**

_ No! Be gone with you!_

_** Fine.**_

Yay! I won against myself! Aren't subconscious's annoying?

Great, now Ron started looking at me like I was crazy.

"Sorry, I grinned sheepishly, "Yes?"

"Umm…can I talk to you for a minute? Like, outside, in the hall?"

This is it! This is it! 

_No! I told you to leave!_

Fine… 

"Sure. Hold on a second." I grabbed my bag, which was crammed full of books, (hey, you never know when you're going to be stuck and need a good book), breathed a few times to relax, then headed for the door with Ron.

"Isn't that a bit heavy?" Ron asked, eyeing my bag rather apprehensively.

"You never know when you might need a book," I replied slightly defensively.

"Okay… If you say so." He replied warily, though I noticed he kept eyeing my bag like it would explode at any moments.

"I'm serious!" I replied indignantly.

"Okay!" he said as he shrugged his shoulders.

We reached finally reached the doors, and stepped quickly into the deserted hallway. He grabbed my arm and pulled me into a dark corner.

**_ Ron and Hermione sitting in a tree…_**

_ No! He's not doing that!_

**_ K-I-S-S-I-N-G!_**

_ No! He's not going to! GO AWAY!_

Ron took a deep breath and started right away.

"Okay, so you know how I like Hannah Abbot, right?"

I sighed, rather deflated. "Yeah…"

"Well, there's another Hogsmeade weekend in two weeks, and I was going to invite her. Do you think I should?"

"Yeah, Ron, you should," I said with my trademark fake smile. Actually, it was my trademark smile, I was the only one who knew it was fake. Actually, it wasn't even trademark either… Okay, I gave him a fake smile.

"Awesome! When should I do it?" Ron asked, grinning like a little boy on Christmas.

"Do it after Herbology, that way you don't have to make awkward conversation afterward, you have to get to class, and if for some strange reason she says 'no'— don't worry, she won't," I added watching his face turn rather green, "but if she does, you won't have to risk dealing with her during class."

"Okay! Thanks Hermione! I owe you big time!" he said as he bounded up the steps towards the Gryffindor tower. I sighed wearily and started that way myself. At least that was my intent. Unfortunately a blonde Slytherin put an end to that.

"So, Weasel doesn't like you back, huh?" he sneered at me.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." I told him coolly, walking towards the stairs.

He blocked me, getting right in my face. "You know exactly what I'm talking about. You like the Weasel, but he likes some Hufflepuff. I guess he refused to sink as low as to date a mudblood," he spat at me.

Theoretically, I would have told him to sod off, and walked towards the Gryffindor tower, eventually losing him. However, Harry and Ginny were walking out of the hall at this point, and only heard the mudblood bit. Harry, being like a brother to me, charged straight towards him, while Ginny tried to hold him back as I rushed to hold her. Malfoy, after getting over the initial shock wore off, and his face went back to its normal color, and he started breathing again, smirked at him, which only incensed Harry further. Thankfully, Dean and Seamus came out around this point, and, in fear of losing House points, helped us held Harry back. Actually, we looked rather amusing, what with Malfoy cracking up, Harry running but getting now where and shouting but not saying anything, thanks to Dean's lovely silencing spell, and Ginny, Dean, Seamus, and I, each with a handful of robes, grinding our heels into the ground to try to restrain Harry.

By this time, it was time to go to first class, and Harry finally calmed down, but I was already pretty frazzled. This was going to be a looong day.


	4. Chapter 3: The Art of Daydreaming

Thank you to all my reviewers:

**_Dwarfed Half Elf:_** Thank you!

**_i-luv-fanfictions:_** I know! I want to smack him! Hmm… I'll try to work that in one chapter :-)…

**_Bhekie:_** Stupid blind Ron… sighs Hope you like the update!

**_Bhekie:_** That's not good! It's happened to me too… hope it all ended well!

**_TheDaughterOfKings:_** Really? Thank you so much…That made my day:-)

**_Mel:_** Yay! Hope you like this update! I'm already thinking about Chapter 4!

**_Moonhawkpebbly:_** Thanks! I'm trying to get Chapter 4 up soon!

**_StNanook:_** Thank you! Here's how I'm trying to work it: This is Year 7 (If I said otherwise elsewhere, I was wrong. It's Year 7) Ron went out with these people in 6th Year. I'm glad you liked Hermione's character! I'm trying to keep her as real as possible!

**_BoX-GhOsT89:_** Isn't it always? Glad you liked it! I hope you keep reading!

**_legolascrazy17:_** Thank you! Again, that made my day! I agree that taking it slow is best. What fun is it if you don't have there crazy antics and obliviousness? And don't worry about that kiss between them…it'll definitely be there!

**_TheDaughterOfKings:_** Will do! Hope you like this one!

A/N: I'm so sorry for the long wait! I had the worst case of writers block! Don't you hate that? But now I'm listening to O-Town and I'm all inspired hehe… ANYHOW here's Chapter 3: The Art of Daydreaming

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or any other company/product mentioned or that poem.

**Chapter 3: The Art of Daydreaming**

Transfiguration was first. Usually, I love that class. Professor McGonagall may be strict, but she's an amazing teacher and the subject is fascinating. However, I sit up front, so I have to pay attention. Usually, there's not a problem. Today, there was a problem. I had hoped that I had a class like Charms or Herbology where I could daydream, but no such luck. In fact, I had double Potions with the Slytherins next.

The two, well three…does a double class count as two classes or one? I had always wondered… ANYWAYS, after my however-many classes and a rather noisy and not-helpful lunch, I had Charms. Aaah, Charms. Good old Charms. And assignment, a group, some objects, and free time to think/socialize. Heaven.

Of course there was the slight problem that I was with Ron…but whatever. Harry was there too.

Almost ten glorious minutes of silence elapsed. Ah, pure, sweet silence. How do I love thee, let me count the ways...

It was too good to last.

"Hey, Hermione, you're being awfully quiet. You haven't corrected me once on my wrist movement. Are you okay?" Ron asked

"What? Oh, sorry, just a little preoccupied." I replied, glancing up.

Harry and Ron gave each other that infuriating look.

"Are you sure? You've barely said 5 words this whole morning since the Malfoy incident." Harry asked rather gently, like he was trying not to hurt me.

I snarled at him.

"Malfoy incident?" Ron questioned, looking between Harry and me, Harry giving me a helpless look and me glaring at him.

"Well…" I looked at Harry for reinforcements, "we just had a slight run-in in the hall. That's it."

"Then why did Harry call it an 'incident'?" Ron asked, eyeing us suspiciously.

I gulped and glared at Harry. If looks could kill, he'd be dead. Mauled. Horribly disfigured. Mutated.

Moving right along….

I stared down at my wand, then my book, then my wand, then my book, trying not to appear like I was thinking about Ron maybe thinking about me but probably thinking about Hannah Abbot who was probably thinking about him to because he's so darn hot. Damn, now my head's spinning.

Which, of course, led to a full fledged daydream.

_The Yule Ball was three years ago, but I still can't stop thinking about it. I had, of course, wished that Ron would ask me. He didn't, obviously. An international Quidditch star did. I SHOULD love that. Heck, I absolutely adore muggle superstars. I heart Johnny Depp. And Orlando Bloom. And Brad Pitt. Though they're a little better in the looks department. Johnny Depp has the BEST cheek bones. And Orlando Bloom's eyes. And Brad Pitt's mouth…mmm… _

_ANYWAYS. I felt myself wishing I was with Ron. I wondered if Ron noticed my dress robes and how the silky material clung to my just-coming curves, and how if I spun it flared out (so fun! And yes, I am very easily amused. Especially by clouds…pretty clouds… woops, back to the story). But he was with Padma. And I was with Viktor. I kind of hoped his anger was jealousy but I knew it wasn't. It was that I was going with the enemy. If he only knew that I might have been playing a trick on the enemy. Not in the conventional Weasley-twin way. But in the sense that though Viktor was amazing, and a great friend, that's all I thought of him as. If anything, I spent the dance wondering what Ron thought, not what Viktor thought. I felt horribly guilty, but in a way it eased my guilt of betraying Harry. If only Ron knew…_

"**HERMIONE GRANGER!**"

I jumped about three feet, tried not to fall off my chair, and clung to the table, full of notes, and just ended up spilling notes everywhere. Hmm… that got Ron noticing me. Though he seemed to have a sort of look on his face like he thought I was crazy. Interesting.

"Umm… Hermione? Class is over?" Ron said, looking at me while I hurriedly gathered my things and shot out of the room.

Wide open spaces, Wide open spaces…. Remember the wide open spaces… only three more flights until the Gryffindor tower.

Why must I always make a fool out of myself? It will take me hours of studying to get over this.

A/N: There you go, Chapter 3. So short I want to kill it, but it just came that way I swear. innocent face Not as much humor, but I was trying to do more of her thoughts. I promise more action next time. And I'll think about it all during school tomorrow, seeing as I've been getting rather lazy in the whole note-taking thing gasps Anyways, hoped you liked it! Reviews (especially with constructive criticism) always appreciated!

(Wish me luck I'm going to fill out a job application! Summer scooping ice cream here I come!)


	5. Chapter 5

I apologize profusely. I can't believe it took this long… I don't even have a good excuse. Please don't hurt me too badly…

Disclaimer: The characters, basic story line, and other things like that still belong to J.K. Rowling. Darn.

To All My Reviewers: Thank you so much, you guys are the best. I'll put individual ones next time, but for this chapter I'm just going to work on the story. But thank you!

**Chapter 4: The Art of Avoidance**

Deep breaths. DEEP breaths. Calm Hermione. Calm.

So it's nothing new- just walking down to dinner right? So I'm just a little shaken. Possibly because I missed the fact that the last class ended… and Ron was the one who had to yell at me to tell me I had. And quite possibly because the reason I missed it was because I was daydreaming.

And quite QUITE possibly because I was daydreaming about him.

So as you can see, the whole breathing-and-walking-at-the-same-time thing has kind of gone out the door, mostly because I'm too busy over-analyzing the entire scene:

Maybe he didn't notice… 

YOU WERE SITTING THERE DROOLING LIKE AN IDIOT! OF COURSE HE NOTICED!

Maybe note, I mean, he doesn't notice me when I try to get his attention usually! 

Yes, well, maybe you're just a tad too subtle. Keep at this, though, and he'll be sure to notice you. He might even call his nice friends at the psychiatry ward.

I am NOT psychotic! 

_**Hello? Having conversations in your brain? Just a little…**_

I looked over to see Ron talking animatedly to Harry. He did something with his hands that looked vaguely like he was trying to be a Muggle airplane, like little kids do when they're playing. Shaking my head and promising myself I wouldn't ask, I slipped away to go sit with Parvarti and Lavender, who were talking about, what else, boys.

"Hermione! Oh my gosh, hi!" Lavender squealed as I slid into the seat next to her.

"Hey Hermione! Aren't you going to sit with Ron and Harry?" Parvati questioned, a look on her face that obviously stated that she knew that something was up, and she wanted to know. I decided to play it cool. HAHAHA. More to the point, I decided to stammer a response, blush, and try to convince them that this was perfectly normal.

"Umm, no, they were going on about something, and I really didn't feel like joining in the conversation, so, yeah…" I could feel my face burning, so I looked down at the pork chop I had just transferred onto my plate and concentrated on cutting it without somehow injuring myself or any other person in the process.

"Really? You guys didn't fight or anything? 'Cause, you know, you've been out roommate for like, 5 years, and if something happened, you can tell us, honest. We can keep a secret, we swear." Great. Now Lavender was looking at me all intensely and trying-to-be-sympathetically like she knew that I was hiding something, and that she knew I knew that she knew it, and if she played the whole roommate-for-5-going-on-6-years card I might tell. Jeez, for someone so blonde she can be so sneaky! Well, two can play this game. She's getting nothing out of me.

"Oh, I know. Nothing happened, I just felt like some gossip and girl-talk, that's all." Hah, take that Lavender Brown. Hmm, it seemed to have worked, she and Parvati are looking at each other, and shrugging and…. Yes! Back to the conversation on who was on the 50 Sexiest Wizards in England list in Witches Weekly. Now I'll just nod I like I follow that garbage too.

"Hermione! What's up? Did you and my brother have a fight?" Dang it, easier said than done. If it isn't Miss Ginevra Weasley, Thou-Who-I-Am-Determined-Not-To-Think-About's sister.

"Oh, no, I just needed little change. Too much testosterone for me," I laughed. Hmm… maybe she'll but that. After all, she did grow up in a house with 6 brothers.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Just checking, because if you had, I might have to beat his sorry little ass." I laughed with Ginny, both of us knowing full well that she could beat his "sorry little ass" if she wanted to. But he does have really strong arms… and I doubt the rest of him is so bad either…

No! Stop it brain! No thinking like that at the dinner table! 

_**Fine! You're so boring!**_

Yea, but at least I'm not thinking dirty thoughts at dinner! 

_**Yes you are! We're the same brain! Oh oh! Score!**_

_Quiet you._

"So, Hermione, what do you think of John Thompson? You know, the lead singer of Grinding Ghouls? Isn't he just DIVINE?" Sigh, the smaller life forms at the table seem to have been reduced to giggling heaps. Hmm, maybe I should look at this guy, it might help me get over…You-Know-Who. Wait- not THAT You-Know-Who. The You-Know-Who who has a red hair. Yes, that's it. From now on, HE's The Redhead. Enh, that sound weird. Oh well, I know who I'm talking about

_**So does the rest of the wizarding world, genius.**_

…_Shut up. He'll be…oh whatever he'll just be HIM or HE._

'Cause THAT's differentiating.

_Again, shut up._

Wow, that arguing took up a lot of time. The Bimbos and Ginny were done eating, and I had pretty much destroyed my pork chop, so we started heading back, all laughing about something, I missed what but I figured if I laughed I'd look less pathetic.

Hmm, was that HIM (See? See? It works!) looking at me? Oh oh! Was that HIM (Hehe fun!) leaning over to whisper something to Harry? Score!

Either that or I have something in my teeth or I sat in something, but we won't discuss this possibility.

We kept going back to the dorm, gossiping about the Supreme Gorgeousness of some wizard, not that Thompson guy. Its so confusing to have a conversation with them I swear. Whatever, I'll take Orlando Bloom any day. He is most definitely the Epitome of Hottness. But I digress. We made it to the Gryffindor Tower, where the Bimbos went off to dive into Cosmo Witch and Ginny went to finish her Charms homework. I decided to get my latest book, History of Hogsmeade, (it's fascinating, really) and make a serious dent in it. I just can't get enough of the history of these Wizarding communities.

Oops, here come Lavender and Parvati again. I never should have eaten dinner with them. BIG mistake. They better not be coming to tell me that I should let them make me over, because they have that same solemn look on their face that they did the last four hundred seventy six times they told me that. Oh, they have books. That's good. That's very good. Or it may be bad. Very bad. I'm leaning towards the latter.

"Hey Hermione. Parvati and I were talking, weren't we Parvati?" Lavender said, looking at Parvati for confirmation, which she got in the form of a solemn nod. You'd think someone died.

"Well, we found these books and thought you might like to use them." Lavender finished talking and was now holding to books out to me. One said Wizards are From Mars, Witches are from Venus on the cover, the other said Charms to Improve Your Appearance.

"Because you like reading and stuff," Parvati explained, now looking at me hopefully while Lavender went to say something else.

"And, if you like, we can make you over. I'm sure Ron would like it. You were only staring at him all dinner."

Bad Words. Very Bad Words.

"Don't worry, he was staring at you too. God, you guys need flirting advice," Parvati reassured me, shaking her head.

"So what do you say?" Twin pairs of big eyes stared at me, like they wanted a doggy treat or something. Right then Ron came in. And immediately his eyes found me, and I looked away. I must be tomato red by now. Oh great, now the Bimbos are raising they're eyebrows, and opening they're mouths really wide….

Isn't this blackmail?

"Fine," I said, before they could yell anything I'd regret. Wait does that make sense? Oh well.

The things I do for avoidance…

So there it is. More to come. I swear. A pinkie promise. Before Christmas. And if I don't update by then…. you have my permission to never review again. gasps So, anyhoo, please review, and a new one will come soon. SOOO…. G'night. (I'm finishing this at night, but feel free to substitute another time of day in there.)

Oh, and I swear there won't be any "transformed" Hermione, because I'm all for Hermione being bookish and brainy and sans-pancake make-up, so don't worry, there is a method to my madness, as one of my teachers would say.


End file.
